As I continue to shape my plans for 2023, I recognize the need for task management software. My Mac's Stickies app was overwhelmed and Google Tasks was just not cutting it (subtasks were broken for the default list, but working for others). Thus, I opted for Todoist. I totally stripped it down: nothing on the sidebar with the exception of projects and index; I took out that karma nonsense and scoring system; I even disabled its smart date functionality as that's always just bedeviled me.

In the past, I'd flip between the task managers with a bent toward gamification. But today, I just have no interest in that; I want to get the job done.

Speaking of getting the job done, all THREE of the fitness games I wanted went on sale yesterday, so I snapped them up:

• Synthrider ($12.49, 50% off) - I've been considering this for the last couple of weeks as a potential Supernatural replacement.

• Until You Fall ($12.49, 50% off) - With a fantasy element, it seems like something I might like.

• Pistol Whip ($20.99, 30% off) - I got my hands on this demo before—who knew I'd start shaking my hips and dancing WHILE shooting people? What, am I gonna ask next, "How 'bout a magic trick?"

Not remotely related, but I've discovered I developed a taste for the gelatin byproduct from my sous-vide pork belly cooling process.

Mmm, meaty Jell-O!

And I've learned of a most excellent way to do an inch-thick ribeye with with an air fryer from Kelly Hogan. Set it to 15 minutes at 400 and when it gets to 10 minutes, put the steak in. It'll get it to medium rare. SO MUCH faster than a sous-vide, reverse sear approach. Check Kelly's out.

OK, lastly, I'm TOTALLY pumped: a couple of nights ago, it hit me out of the blue that I had no need to ever SSH into my webhost to rebuild my static site. See, my host alllows me to run a cron job by the hour. All I have to do is to get my script working correctly—I had to account for lack of a .bashrc file for the cron job (configuring the shell is part of my writeup here). I've got one job running at midnight (for future dated posts) and another at noon! And thus, I can just upload a file! It's a simple thing that Wordpress can post automatically at a future time, but it's fun to think that I'm doing it with a static result.

You'll find it in the veil of night where solitude is born
In the emptiness of broken flesh,
at the mercy of the thorns

These Demon Hunter lyrics enchant me. Who am I when I am weak, not hidden with a puffed-up chest? Who am I when a challenge is before me and I no longer have a mask for the mirror? Yes, who am I when I'm low. Indeed, I am at my greatest strength when I am humbled, for everything else is just a set piece for the stage.

I am ending my relationship with Supernatural, the VR fitness app on my Meta Quest 2 with a $20/m subscription fee. I can only tolerate so much from an organization actively promoting sin. I'll quote the same passage that Phil Robertson cited on homosexuality that got him suspended from Duck Dynasty by A&E:

Don't you know that the unrighteous will not inherit God's kingdom? Do not be deceived: No sexually immoral people, idolaters, adulterers, or anyone practicing homosexuality, no thieves, greedy people, drunkards, verbally abusive people, or swindlers will inherit God’s kingdom.

1 Corinthians 6:9-10, HCSB

(And yes, that's from the same 1 Corinthians that features chapter 13's famous passage on love that makes its way into wedding ceremonies.)

The thing is, yeah, I've lusted; I've seen money as a god; I've been greedy; I've been drunk; and I've said hurtful things, however, the difference is, I have been broken by it, I have repented to my beautiful Lord. In my shame and sadness of hurting this relationship with God, I've read through David's Psalm 51. Through this life-long process of sanctification, I'm heartbroken over my sin and my Father embraces me.

The passage continues:

And some of you used to be like this. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

1 Corinthians 6:11, HCSB

I am reminded by Todd Agnew's Still Here Waiting:

I fail to see
Why You'd still be waiting to forgive me
After all that I have done
But I cannot say
That one time I returned and You had turned away
Your love never fails

Sin is not something to find PRIDE! It's not something to parade about and put on a false face with a smile carved into it! As Jesus said concerning sin, "A thief comes only to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come so that they may have life and have it in abundance" (John 10:10, HCSB). That's the thing, we think that sin is our delight, but in the end, it leads to death (with heartache in its wake). Satan is not creative; he only twists the good things of God. Jesus gives us a life of value, a life of adventure. Today.

It would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.

C.S. Lewis

So, Supernatural has been uninstalled. It should have just been a fun little fitness app. Nevertheless, the frog has long been cooked from a slow boil.

In another move, I closed my Spotify account. The playlists it suggests to me actually amuse me: a Norwegian company promoting hip hop and rap to me is just...well, like Jackie Chan conversing in a Chris Tucker pool hall. And frankly, Spotify's heuristics are questionable. I literally listen to Kingston Trio; Peter, Paul and Mary; and The Hobbit scores! *sigh* It's all so...fake. Indeed, the world is like an ignorant child sitting in the mud. And maybe that's the thing, people try to adopt an identity of strength, but we are all broken. And when we find our identity in sin, we sit alone in a fog of hopelessness.

By contrast, here is a conversation held a month ago by two men of God who, along with the late R.C. Sproul, have influenced me the most in my life: John Piper during my time out of college and years thereafter and John MacArthur, in more recent years, my favorite preacher. The discussion recounts their own lifelong pursuit of God in their respective ministerial roles and application today:

YouTube Link

I continue to waft between an exclusive Mac ecosystem and hybrid utility involving Google. I haven't even begun to make the move, but I know it's coming. The ads are too many. The walled-off data are too much. I won't belabor the point here. It's challenging that developers design sites specifically for Chrome—I was looking to try out a course on Udemy but the video preview's audio apparently was not compatible. And again, if I leave Google, I have to do flips to make my phone functional and I don't even know if apps get updated when I do. And then there's my Chinese e-reader, Onyx, a device that will play a prominent role in 2023, that runs on Android.

I miss the time when a website was just a website. They had no control over our lives. They sure didn't run that beeper and later my Nokia. Even the mind-numbing amount of login credentials is abysmal. The most novel login/password system I've seen is from ImprovMX, the service I now use to forward my INTJBill.com emails since I've closed my Tutanota account. To login, they just send an email to the forwarding address. That simple. There's no password to hack because there's no password.

That ol' UofM train howls across the Saturday nightscape. These nights call back to earlier times, time when I'd hang out with my sister and her husband for a night of Mexican food and all-night Playstation...or sow a handful of wild oats with Piggly Wiggly buddies...or make another smile in an amber haze. All of these have slipped through my fingers as only time's sand can. Some are gone; some are gone forever.

Tonight is set for the Simon and Garfunkel 1997 compilation, Old Friends. This 3-CD set evokes such ardent feelings out of me. It once accompanied me in 3 AM drives with an Everlong interstate. Forever will I remember, "And the moon rose over an open field."

I've lost many friends. I know, I know, this isn't the place to open the heart! I talk about geeky things—I've even geeked out on talking about carnivore. Isn't this the place that is a diary in name only? It's not 20 years ago! We must protect ourselves for people will exploit us.

I've lost a friend. I don't know if I lost her forever or she chose to walk away. The last time I heard from her, she sent me a picture of her picking mushrooms leading up to her 31st birthday in September. And that was the last time. I met her in 2010, a Czech who not only shared my INTJ personality, but also who had a mutual interest in music.

Whenever people would come into and then leave my life, or whatever new scene would develop and then fade out, there she was, a friend unchanged, a warm smile in the background. She was such a curiosity—she had a tiny frame with a Nina Simone voice. She had a love for linguistics, baking and simple things, like a walk in a forest. And inexplicably, she's now gone. No reason to go. Just gone.

How often have I disappeared into the night, closed doors or broke hearts! How I hope...it's just that.

Time it was
And what a time it was, it was
A time of innocence
A time of confidences

Long ago it must be
I have a photograph
Preserve your memories
They're all that's left you

Bookends, Paul Simon