It was two years today that I moved from a June's keto to a carnivore diet that extended 637 days. The first bulletpoint from Web MD as to scury's cause lists: "Don't include fruits and vegetables in your diet for many months." Yawn. The Establishment. Sad.

They say that symptoms arise after 90 days. I HAD THEM (!):

• Lethargy - I left all of my energy out on the floor with those 3:30 - 6AM workouts. Or my 3:30 -5:30 AM workout followed by a drive up to the gym for another hour.

• Body aches - You are not kidding! I'd wreck my body again and again. The biggest problem was my knuckles for hitting the bag too hard. I'd switch to forearm/elbow strikes for the next workout and jack them up as well. I ran out of striking surfaces! (I guess there was always my head.)

• Swelling - Yeah, these delts, bruh.

• Bruising - I'd walk around a Tigers' gameday and no doubt bruised a lot of beer-bellied, 40-something-year-old guys' egos when their wives would check me out—OK, so to my knowledge this happened only once, but lemme embellish it!

• Oral problems - I never could keep my mouth shut how awesome carnivore is.

• Old wounds open - Every workout I'd find something from deep within to pour into my training. That's basically the whole new wave genre, right?

Further risks: I even blew up a concrete, storm shelter bunker with these two hands! These superhuman notions nearly wrenched my arm out of socket as I was dragging that deck's 4x4 encased in concrete that hit another one that I dug up.

Quick, somebody toss an orange juice before I attempt to stop trucks from moving with my bare hands (again)! "Lend me some sugar, I am your neighbor."

Coffee

It is not completely accurate that I had ABSOLUTELY NO plants in those 637 days: I drank coffee. On my current carnivore streak, I heavily considered giving up this drug, but I'm going to let it run shotgun beside me again. To be fair, I lost 149 lbs with coffee in my corner from WAY back, even in that low calorie nonsense that was the ups and downs of the 1-12 Expeditions. For those of you playing at home, that's a 22 BMI drop (48.9 to 26.9). Coffee has earned its place. And talk about steeped with memories...I can't say that for sugar juice.

The 28th Expedition Moustache

Today marks my third day on my reinvigorated fitness adventure. Sound familiar? Like, oh, I dunno...EXACTLY a week ago?! I pulled down this website and flipped on the switch to the food conveyor. Nom nom nom nom nom nom. Yes, the proverbial Twinkies of Shame (everything is Twinkies). Oh, that emotional vixen of Little Debbie! She seduced me on that August night as I was in such wretched pain! It has taken everything in me to leave her flabby, McLovin' arms! Ah, but what she, Marie Callender and all the others offer is but a TV-laden loveseat. "They've never seen the Northern Lights. They've never seen a hawk on the wing." I wish I "never hung (my) hat up at (Nutty Buddy's) place. I should've been a cowboy."

So, along with my coffee, I'm taking this website on this journey into the horizon. For whatever reason, it's my weightloss talisman.

And if I may continue the western theme further still...I had a fun idea in my head that I'm rolling with as of today: I was growing a beard since August and though how fun it might be to close out the year with just a moustache so that I can shave it off on New Year's Eve. I'll then kick off 2023 and The 29th Expedition with another attempt at that untouched growth for a year beard. For me, facial hair reminds me of my progress, how far I've traveled...

I have waded through the dumpster for far too long. I have rummaged Garbage Compactor 3263827 and only came away with a dianoga at my throat. Should I have expected more? Indeed, I have witnessed far too much vitriol on comment threads. It shapes a man's soul. I'll read the "you owe me" mantra and can hear the rattling of each keystroke. And the venom has spread to the (angry teenager) journal-ists as the articles become little more than the clickbait of the masses. It is easy to feed the fire in a culture that no longer believes in truth as "everyone did what was right in his own eyes." I am Picard in this classic scene of four lights. And while I once reveled in the hijinx of the BabylonBee, when sarcasm hits a mark far too close to reality, laughter in resentful robs joy and calluses the heart.

Not until "the Lady of the Lake, her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite, held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by divine providence that I" wield supreme executive power should I invest much emotional stock in the ways of governance. And yes, given my Emperor Palpatine mantle, I would cut so many programs it would make Ron Swanson dance! I mean, my entire basis is found inside Don't Buy Stuff You Cannot Afford.

And since I don't have that kind power, why emotionally respond in a way to mimic that I do? Does a blustering rabble of words raise reality or rob tranquility?

Everything I've written today was inspired by this simple YouTube clip, 4K Cozy Coffee Shop with Smooth Piano Jazz Music for Relaxing, Studying and Working. While I intended it to transport me to another place for writing, its comments section is from an Internet that never was.

I dedicated a total of 105 minutes of Thursday in both afternoon and evening workouts on the the Supernatural app with trainer, Leanne Pedante. It continued my workout streak on the platform past the 4th day. The most curious song I trained to today was Soul Bossa Nova by Quincy Jones. You know it:

YouTube Link

...yeah, that one was fun to move to!

I also relaxed for a spell in Beat Saber and was able to get through Blinding Lights on normal mode for my first time. Here's an example from a random player:

YouTube Link

It was just this August when I'd limp around the house with crutch in hand with that knee injury. I could not lift my foot beyond an inch off the floor! While I've made significant progress, I'm not completely out of the woods with it yet as there's something iffy going on with it as there remains a little fluid build up. Nevertheless, I feel confident that between my carnivore and training approaches, I'll simma down now it. I'm aided that Supernatural is a low-impact program that runs my heart through its paces without me even knowing it. I even have to check my Garmin to keep from redlining the ol' engine.